The Mirror Effect

Have you ever had the experience of helping someone with something you struggle with?

Earlier this week I had the privilege of coaching a creative, well-spoken person who wanted to get over their fear of publishing a post on social media. They expressed some fear around what people would think of their opinions, their writing style, or their attempt at simply starting a conversation about something they felt passionate about. “What if someone’s already made these points? What if no one understands what I’m trying to say? What if people question my qualifications for speaking on this topic? What if I’m just a bad writer??”

Sound familiar? It does to me, too. Like my client, I am hesitant to take risks like that. It’s one thing to express myself verbally with trusted friends and colleagues, but to expose yourself to the Internet, well, that’s quite something else.

Talking with this client in some ways was like looking in a mirror. How this person so clearly articulated the very challenge facing me was timely, and astonishingly close to my own experience. It required a certain amount of self-management to place my issues to the side so that I could stay in service of my client.

There are times when I’ve overcome those symptoms of imposter syndrome by simply taking one small action. “Don’t think about it—just do it.” It feels like a leap of faith. When trying something new, I’ll tell myself this is simply an experiment, and one I can learn from. I can start by taking a single action, checking in with myself (yes, I did actually survive that!), and building muscle in this new area. It’s amazing how quickly forward motion dispels fear and “right sizes” that sense of risk.

What causes you to hesitate from expressing your opinions in a public forum? How do you overcome your fears of putting your voice out into the world?